Thai iced tea is one of the great restaurant drinks and one of the most marked-up: three or four dollars for a glass whose ingredients cost about forty cents. Brewed at party scale it becomes almost absurdly cheap, and aged rum belongs in it. The molasses and vanilla in a dark rum run directly alongside the condensed milk, so it tastes less like a spiked tea than like the drink was always supposed to have rum in it.
The tea must be brewed much stronger than you would drink it plain. Condensed milk, evaporated milk, and ice all dilute, and a normal-strength tea disappears under them into something beige and vaguely sweet. Use double the leaves you would ordinarily and steep for a full five minutes. The result should taste almost unpleasantly strong on its own, which is exactly right.
Traditional Thai tea mix gets its orange color from food coloring, and you do not need it. A strong black tea such as Ceylon, with star anise, cardamom and a little vanilla, gives you the actual flavor of the drink. The color comes out amber rather than neon, which is honestly the better-looking glass.
Thai Iced Tea Rum Punch
Ingredients
- 10 cups water
- 10 bags black tea or 1/3 cup loose-leaf Ceylon or Assam
- 4 star anise pods
- 6 cardamom pods lightly crushed
- 1 cinnamon stick
- 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 pinch salt
- 1 can sweetened condensed milk 14 ounces
- 1 cup evaporated milk or half-and-half
- 2 cups aged dark rum
- 8 cups crushed ice for serving
- 1/2 cup evaporated milk for floating
- 10 star anise pods optional, for garnish
Instructions
- Bring the water to a boil, then take it off the heat and add the tea, star anise, cardamom, cinnamon stick, and salt.
- Steep for 5 full minutes. This is a deliberately over-strong brew — anything less vanishes once the milk and ice go in.
- Strain out the tea and whole spices, pressing gently on the bags, and stir in the vanilla while the tea is still hot.
- Whisk the sweetened condensed milk into the hot tea until it fully dissolves. Hot liquid is the only way it incorporates smoothly; cold tea leaves it as a sludge at the bottom.
- Whisk in the 1 cup of evaporated milk, then cool the mixture to room temperature and refrigerate for at least 2 hours.
- Taste once it is cold, since cold mutes sweetness. Add a tablespoon more condensed milk if it needs it.
- Stir in the rum just before serving, and give the pitcher a good stir — the milk settles as it sits.
- Fill tall glasses with crushed ice, pour the punch over, and float a spoonful of evaporated milk on top of each for the layered look. Add a star anise pod if you have extras.
